Monday, November 28, 2011

Tanks and routines

I dunno about other mothers, but ever since I left the hospital I've had to wear a nursing bra 24/7. Lemme let you in on a secret. Bras? Can get very uncomfortable if you wear them too long. And before baby, I was the kind of person to just take mine off as soon as I got home from work. It was like a signal for my body to get into relax-at-home mode and out of work mode. "You should get a fitting!" I can hear the ladies crying. Relax, I've had one and I know my size, etc. But no matter how comfy the bra is when you first buy it, it's going to start to sag and pull and just show its wear and tear. And it's going to get uncomfortable if you wear one for an extended period of time. I know there are women who wear them because they are more comfortable than without, but as a "well endowed" girl, I can say that it is much MUCH nicer to just let it all hang out, so to speak.

Anyway, I picked up a nursing tank (why is it called a tank? Am I in the army?) and it is SO MUCH BETTER. It feels like a shirt instead of a bra, and is just so comfy. I LOVE IT.

NEXT UP: Okay, can we talk about sleep schedules? Routines? Because yeah, I don't understand them, I think. When I complain that it's always up in the air when C. goes to bed, they say put her on a schedule! Start a routine! I'm like, Okay! How do I do that?

Seriously, this doesn't make sense. We tried it and it was FAIL. Nurse, rocking, singing, bed. As soon as she hit the mattress she was like, WTF. Since we aren't doing cry it out or anything, what was the next move? I ended up doing what we always do, nurse her to sleep and then move her to the crib. She usually wakes up a bit when we do this and knows she's going in the crib (opens her eyes, struggles for 0.2 seconds).

Anyway, it wasn't until later that I had a mini epiphany. Nursing her to sleep is part of her routine, but the END of the routine. I need to build from that and create a routine that signals to her that sleep is going to happen soon, but it will still end with nursing to sleep, then crib. I know, it sounds super easy and something everyone already knows, but when people say "routine routine routine" they don't really elaborate on HOW a routine is created, and that you need to incorporate what has worked for your child in the past and you can totally use what you've been doing to get your kid to sleep up to that point. I feel like sometimes advice like this is touted so often that people forget that first time parents are in completely foreign territory and don't have a frame of reference to draw from and so, like us, will just FAIL and feel like shitty parents because their kid doesn't sleep when they need her to.

In other news, C. pooped so hard that I had to strip her out of her clothes and hose her down in the sink. AGAIN.

Monday, November 21, 2011


Stupid internet. Guess who's never heard the lyrics to "Turn Around" before? Yeah.

My kid is nearly five months, but already I'm feeling this way about her growth. Every time I look up from whatever I'm doing, it seems like she's suddenly so much bigger. I was actually going to write a post about it called "Turn Around" because that's so close to what it feels like. GUESS I'M NOT THE FIRST PERSON TO FEEL THIS WAY.

You know how people always talk about living "in the moment" and I'm all, yeah, sure I will, but I have to like, make plans and grocery lists for tomorrow and stuff. So I've never really had the idea of living in the moment explained to me.

Yesterday I watched a Nature episode called "My Life as a Turkey" and the guy was talking about the beauty and stillness of the wild turkey (I know...) and how they didn't betray the moment by worrying about the future, which will by definition never come, so therefore the present is the best they've got. This comes close to my heart because I always feel that everything is passing by so quickly and I'm trying to catch it and relish the NOW but it just slips by before I can blink. And it suuuuuuucks. This was brought into perfect clarity right after my c-section, when I discovered that my previous feelings that I was a laid back, non-anxious person were proven completely wrong. It's almost as if post pregnancy hormones just bring any little hangup you used to ignore right to the surface of your personality, until you are bursting into sobs just watching your slumbering baby get her hearing test.

BTW Thanksgiving was yesterday! It was great fun, but prepping for that big meal is completely different when you know you have the ticking time bomb of a screaming baby in your near vicinity. However, I got not one, but TWO turkey carcasses out of it to make turkey stock later. Oh man oh man food boner you guys. SO EXCITE.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Non-Liquid Diet


Went to the pediatrician on Thursday. They'd screwed up my appointment as usual, so I was "late." Not sure how I can screw up inputing the appointment on my calendar when I do it RIGHT THERE IN RECEPTION. They'd also thought I had another appt next week. Um, no, also why? But I forgive them, because our pedi is also awesome and great and his nurses love love love C.

Anyway, he mentioned that we should start solids soon. Like, in a month. I'd been dreading this because seriously? C. is just five weeks old or something, she needs mommy's milk and THAT'S IT. In no way is she growing up or getting bigger or...wait she's nearly 5 months isn't she. Dear god.

My little itty bitty baby is going to start eating real food soon. How can this be? The delivery is still so fresh in my mind, I feel like I could go right back there. Can that really have been almost half a year ago?

Well, after sort of getting used to the idea (last week my brain was all NO NO NO) I'm kinda sorta looking forward to it. After all, figuring this stuff out is kinda fun. Should I make my own baby food? What about organic food? What about baby-led eating? I want to expose her to many palates and foods (OMG WHAT ABOUT CHOKING NO SOLIDS EVER OMG). Yeah, a bit bi-polar on this issue.

The other thing is she hasn't really shown ANY interest. Sure, she puts stuff in her mouth, but she's constantly teething right now with two little bumps in the center of her bottom gums ready for eruption. Sometimes she'll watch me eat/drink something with a weird fascination on her face. I've heard that in the first months, "feeding" them is more like "seeing what ends up down her throat, and cleaning up her face after." I sill have to find out basics like how much to feed at first, when to start feeding stuff that isn't mixed with milk, what about nuts and other allergens, etc. Sigh.

Also, not looking forward to different and more disgusting poops. Not. At. All.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

First World Awesomness

Hoo! *blows dust everywhere* Man, this thing hasn't been used in a while.

Wow, depressing last post. Everyone* must have thought I up and killed myself after my mom's cat died. Nope! I procreated instead. About four months ago. Yeah.

So I guess this is going to be a mommy blog now or something. I mean, not every post would be about my amazing snowflake baby but a bunch of them will. Say around 78% baby related stuff. Probably some other crap thrown in about my own thoughts or what happened on the last Buffy episode I watched (thx netflix).

My baby's name is [REDACTED]. Oh right, there likely will be no pictures and no names since I would like to keep her online footprint to a minimum until she can control it herself. Until she can expressly give me permission to post her info, say around 13 (hey, its good enough for Facebook) there will be very little.

Okay, enough about babies. Lets talk about the little things. You know, the things that make life easier and you can't really imagine it without them. For a FTM, there are but a few. Target. Amazon Prime. BJ's. Grandparents that live in the same town as you (both sets, haha, I got it made). Aden+Anais blankets. A husband who knows how to drive the oven.

And now, this.

Dude, it is a PUMP for your SHAMPOO. No longer do I need to laborously reach up to grasp my Suave. No more to squeeze out some variable amount of soap for my head (too much, takes forever to come out. Too little and you are stuck with oily patches in the back). What's that? The crack of the bottle cap as it snaps off because I banged it into the shower tile by accident? NEVER AGAIN.

You guys have no idea what kind of amazing this is. Did you ever want to ring those desk bells when you were a kid but never got to because who even needs those anymore, seriously? And if you do use it, YOU look like the jackass even though the guy behind the desk was AWOL? Pumping out your shampoo is like finally getting to ring that damn bell, only you get to do it every morning and you get the exact same amount of shampoo every time (and you can pump it again if you need more, wow!)

Why yes, I am a cheap date. I assure you I was this way before I had children as well, just ask my sister. And yes, I DO get to shower every morning because I have a husband who understands that daily cleaning of my body is not negotiable. That and I really really want to play with the pump action shampoo.

*No one reads this blog, what the hell